Epilogue

I had a lot of preconceived notions before I came to Korea.  I thought when I came to Korea it’d be like the munchkin world in Wizard of Oz where I’d always have to watch my step for the little tiny Korean people.  I could put a few old guys in my backpack and we could play Empire Strikes Back.  Now Shaq and I will have something to talk about.  I was wrong.

Korea is a crazy place, no doubt.  Eighteen year old girls will outdrink me and then kick my ass with taekwondo.  There’s so many bright lights and flashes that I’m now ADD and colorblind to neon.  But Korea’s a wonderful place, isn’t it?  An old woman held her umbrella over me during a rain storm once.  A waiter stood three tables over and watched me down my entire meal just to make sure I could eat it properly.  I saw a man holding a live chicken at the Daegu train station and a Korean man standing beside me looked me and said in perfect English, “That’s really weird, huh?”

But most of all, I’ll miss you guys, my dear Gunsan friends.  We’re all weirdos or losers who came together as friends to vomit on each other and make some extra money unwisely shaping the youth of Korea.  Look, it’s clear.  We’re not the best and the brightest.  Many of us are borderline retarded  in both mental capacity and life decisions.  But we did the best we could and I love you all.  Thank you for a wonderful year in Korea.

I seriously can’t wait to go home.  Final post tomorrow.